Why does my ex want to be friends so badly reddit I finally start to float away and she pulls me back down. For me, the best way of getting over my feelings with my ex was admitting to myself my fears. You are probably lonely. 2 years!! of being mindfull of who i actually try to trust and now time has shown that they really are my friends because i was critcial to myself and held myself accountable for how i am and how they are. 3 weeks later we start talking again. My ex initially asked to be friends, but slowly it turned into more after him saying it would never go that way - when I questioned him about it, he told me he knew it would always end up being more, and apparently so did I - so be careful, their intentions are usually different from their offer. Your friends should respect your wishes and not interact with him. At first it was great, and I remembered why we were friends to begin with. This caused a huge blowout, where she called me every name in the book, and she and her friend both ghosted me. It's been a week and for some reason everything in me wants to go back. He keeps telling me I need to ignore him, and he’s just an immature, bitter person. Why Does My Ex Want to Be Friends? If your ex wants to remain friends with you after the divorce, you might wonder what motivates them. Do I want to see him happy in another relationship? Wow this list is IT. You are always going to be starving for validation because of anxiety and false hope. We do. It makes me feel horrible. It's far from okay, but who doesn't want to get back at their abusive ex? Your ex was a piece of garbage, and so is mine. Was with my ex for 4 years and he bad mouthed me so bad to our entire friend group I decided to just walk away from all of them. I want him to feel the loss of my son like I did. We don’t really know what’s going to happen, he doesn’t know how he feels, and once once of us moves on (I am actively looking) the here is a short run down on why i dislike her friend circle. I'm not going to, that's why I'm posting here. This guy isn’t wanting a friend to go for coffee every once n awhile. In the fact that he never got that hold over me in the end. Ok, deal. So I broke up with him. I (27f) met my boyfriend's (35m) ex wife (29f) and I want them to get back together. Maybe write your thoughts out, send them to a friend, just don't contact your ex. we were never ‘friends’ before, we started as lovers, everything was too intense and there’s still some physical attraction. I’m in a similar situation. They also are aloud to make their own decisions though. We didn't talk for awhile and some reached out to me and for some I reached out to them. I refuse to give in to his breadcrumbs. I (28f) dated my ex (27m)for 3 and a half years. It’s not The same exact thing happened to me. He never wanted to travel or support me, he constantly called me stupid, and other things, despite the fact I learnt his language proficiently, paid my own way and have many qualifications and degrees under my belt. My ex did the samea and still wanted me as her “best friend” so i went no contact and she was upset. If I'm so much better, why are you with him?" and see what she says. We had a 2 year relationship if she was angry she would block me for days and but now she doesn't block him at she said to me he would scold her and she would be hurt but for their love it's okay Why Does My Ex Want to Be Friends So Badly? (13 Possible Reasons!) 1. His public image is very important to him. my ex girlfriend and me broke up about 2 months ago and 2 weeks after the breakup was already with some other guy and they kissed. Finally don’t end up trying to be friends. I hate being on bad terms with anyone and the last person I thought I’d be on bad terms with, is him. She knew we would never get back Do they really want to strike up a platonic relationship, or are they after something else? The good thing is that you’re not alone: lots of people are wondering why an ex would ever want to be friends so badly. I reconnected with my jr high best friend after years of not talking to her. My friend Mary knows Nancy although she did not really keep a close friendship with her as she got more entangled with me over the years. Other than my last ex, I have never talked ill of any of my other previous exes, because they were all good people, we just weren't meant to be. I truly think that. Is it this simple? But I totally understand, why people are saying it. xxxxxxx is a nice person from what i can tell, so realistically i anticipated getting something back like "oh, man. I can almost picture how it went down. She wanted to pretend she was still a good person. Said he did not love me the day after. We are just platonic best friends. This meant we had a 4 month no contact period. i wonder what theyre up to and how theyre doing these days. I'm tired of being treated badly and I'm done. It hurts so badly when you see the people who hurt you started being better people and you know they weren't bad after all, I guess I just want a bit more understanding of why my own ex did that. I am also the one that dumped him because of this, so at least I get the feeling of like I won somehow. She says she doesn’t love me anymore I’m not her type it was all a mistake d she didn’t mean it. People don’t change that quickly and if we broke up, it was for a reason on my side or theirs. We sometimes made flirty or suggestive jokes in passing, but we never crossed those boundaries. Hangs up on me. If anything I would just tell your friends why you did and if you want to be a bit petty(I am and would probably do this) you can show them the thing she sends you. She finally showed her true colors and I'm broken. This is literally one of my biggest issues rn my ex is so damn hot, 100% my type, and I haven’t found a man that looks anywhere near as good looking as he does. The reason I think I can still be good friends with the one ex boyfriends of mine is because we dated so long ago (at least six years since we broke up, and we only dated for a year) and he wasn't a bad guy. Let yourself acknowledge that you still have hopes with him but find a way to remind yourself that things have ended for whatever reason and your real goal should be 100% centered around It's been 8 months since we broke up and we have been on and off friends, but I always have wanted back with her. I just don't understand why my emotions are still on his side after everything he has put me In my experience, when an ex wants to be friends, it either means that they want to get back together, or they want to be "friends" when it's convenient for them [in other words, use me]. She talks about how there is no romantic interest between them, but it’s so easy for them to just be friends. But as time goes by and resentment grows I realize that is something I wouldn’t want to do. She blocked him away for 2 years and had a baby and he found out and has text her and bothered her. My ex lied to me for a very long time. I want him to feel as broken as I was when he abandoned me in my worst moment. And you keep agreeing to it, so why wouldn't he want to continue doing it? I have an ex who used to talk poorly about me to mutual friends, which put me in an awkward situation. I needed that separation. he said it was commitment issues (but i also was willing to wait for him because i loved him so much). When she goes so does my desire to help her. It’s a masochistic deed for those who Instead of sitting at home and wondering, “Why does my ex want to be friends so badly?” or “Why is it that my ex keeps trying to be friends with me?”, it’s better to keep yourself busy and push these thoughts away. obv there are limits, no one wants to hear I was best friends with "Jane" for many, many years. I feel he has unresolved guilt. Plus, we owned a dog together. I was so upset but wanted to stay with him so I ended up doing it. (F) I am friends with my exes. I think it’s a mix of boredom, curiosity, and trying to find any connection in a time where it’s hard to. Well, my ex and I were great friends before the relationship. He knows you’re a great person and he takes advantage of that and wants to control you. ) Why does my ex (M22) still want to sleep with me (F22), but doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me? Is this really such a hard question to figure out? He wants to have sex with you because he finds you attractive and enjoys having sex with you. It definitely sucks when you have to pull yourself away from people who can be fun to be around. Hey I just wanna say I had a very similar experience to you. I’m really close to two of them and one I’m cordial with. Now she is out every weekend and on weekdays with some college friends and is really different from what she used to be. She doesn’t see any of the good. Then once shit hit the fan, I remembered EXACTLY why we stopped being friends. These people clearly only care about what they want from you, not about you, and this isn't your fault. Deliberately excluding, ghosting, flaking and roasting are all signs someone doesn't like you. My first relationship after my divorce so I hadn’t broken up with anyone and 18 years. Why Does my ex want me to be miserable? I have made so many friends with people in my classes who are aspiring for the same goals as me, and life is so much busier and more fulfilling. Imo having good friends is the best and some of my exes have ended up being great friends of mine, even went to their wedding and cheered them on! However, if that is not something you want or can handle (just being friends and only ever being friends, no hoping for something more) then just tell her you’re not in a place to do that and you’d rather just go no contact. using social media so little or having an ex who uses social media so little for it make a mental health difference whether one followed an ex or did not trying to make things "peaceful" between the exes by maintaining the most detached form of a connection through a social media follow trying to maintain a friendship with an ex trying to be My ex is so mean. My ex and I broke up the first time because of conflicts and he wasn't willing to work on it (he thought it was pure incompatibility). This could explain why he left so suddenly and why he reacted the way he did when you told him you loved him. Starting from him wanting “approval” from friends (wanting to know if his friends approve/like you) and it turning into his friends teasing him that you are out of his league. Shortly after, I saw him at all kinds of music gigs with Nancy. But my meaningful experiences is studying with my friends, achieving good things with them, have a meal together, or comforting each other. Within a year he’s texting long term ex gf and trying to see her, trying to play games etc. Since we broke up, he got a new hairstyle that I told him to get when we were dating; but he refused. You must decide to accept an apology that you will never get from him and move on. As for my personal experience, I have an ex or two that are still friends, and then one that I despise, and never want to see again because of her cheating. I’m still so in love with him so I also feel like it’s my fault for allowing him back in. He later told someone I was a bitch now that we were broken up. Two weeks after surgery gone never heard from again. i still don’t know why he pushed me away. Told him sorry, no. My parents are now past the fact I left the first college, which they originally took as me saying “No” and “FU” to their dreams for me. In fact, I was in her city to see her a few days before the breakup and she did a great job of hiding all evidence of him (she drove his car and said it's her "roommates boyfriends car") 😂 This man has been so clear that he no longer wants to be with me. In your case OP, maybe take some time to go NC. I keep reading this each time I have the urge to reach out. 🥺 I’m glad you’re leaning into secure. I want to be with him but he's not ready at the moment. My feelings were still there, and I’d go so far as to say they grew stronger. Maybe no one’s pointed out even though talking poorly about you gets your attention (which is probably the thing he really wants right now), it’s not going to help his relationship with you. Why they don’t call or come over. Alas, I cannot change the past, and in interim I have made new friends. Do they really want to strike up a platonic relationship, or are they after something else? The good thing is that you’re not alone: lots of people are wondering why an ex would ever want to be friends so badly. We’re all flawed. Im hanging out with a lot of friends and have a good time with my family but still I just miss her from time to time. And I’m on good terms with my exes/ happy to See them doing well. We have mutual friends; he has been telling them I’m vindictive. Without our child, I don't think I would be close friends with her. Although we’re good now, I just can’t take being his friend because of the bad memories and I just wanna stop talking to him. Every time I’ve tried going no contact with him, he’s always convinced me to do otherwise. after some discussions I proposed to wait three years to start our friendship. ) I had no idea what post break up was supposed to be like and we had agreed to always be friends so I stayed in contact with him, or tried to. I met my boyfriend's ex and I want them back together This is a throw away account because I have workmates on reddit, too. I have been with my boyfriend for nearly a year now. My best friend is basically my sister. I'm friends with some of my exes. Why does he want to keep in touch with me and talk occassionally? He broke up with me after 16 years, it was tough, blocked me on socials but he wants to be on good terms. That’s why my ex-husband was a great guy, so i want to see him thriving. I feel if I keep in touch with him I won't be able to close my feelings towards him. He flipped out on her and me saying he just wanted to talk to a friend who knew what he was going through and who he cares about and cares about him. We're called No Stupid Questions because we believe nobody needs to be attacked for asking a question, but that doesn't mean there are I am friends with my ex wife from several years ago but we work together to raise our daughter. He didn’t return my things for 2 months. Partying seems fun, but I probably would spend it guarding my friends and giving the 'Im watching you boi' aggresive hand signal to any guy that tried to molest them. All my other ex's I have never been friends with. Please bear with me as English is not my first language. Unfortunately, this is a problem with romance. The new boyfriend never had met me and he has influence on my friend therefore I don’t think I will ever hear from her cause of the two. i find myself thinking about lost friends from my past sometimes. My ex was an immature loser. No. so he’d like to be friends. ” Repeat that to yourself over and over again. My friend and I have never had a dispute before, let alone anything like this where she is so upset. and I literally sacrificed friends, time with my family and opportunities in life and at work also my mental health just to make them happy. hookups won't make me feel good. I was a former fearful avoidant and I did so much healing to become secure before I met him. My friends all say the trash took its self out. pulled away yesterday and we had a fight. Will not let me see the dog after he said I could. Fortunately my BPD ex and I are semi long distance (2 hour drive apart) so my chances of running into her or her new BF are low unless they're in my city or I'm in theirs. Fast-forward a little bit more and we’re talking about her Ex again (btw I’ve never said she can’t see him or talk to him, just that it makes me sick to my stomach when she does). I can never hate him no matter what he’s done to me and I find it so hard that he hates me. I’ve decided to still be friends (best friends) with my ex, even if the pain and damage he caused me when we were dating was irreversible. I’m okay with it but it does complicate things. I wasn't jealous, but my ex and I did not get along at all so when they started dating I basically just lost a close friend automatically, and my friend Posted by u/sassybutlovely - 1 vote and 4 comments As someone who was dumped unexpectedly, and I left my ex alone, then he contacted me after 8 months, got intimate with me and ghosted me though he clearly showed interest and affection, (but is avoidant and can’t handle commitment), he undid my healing and I am trying to pick my pieces again, I would say leave him alone. My ex then attempted to gaslight me about these messages. Sorry you both have been in this position too. Coupling is massively privileged and rewarded by society, and being single is stigmatized, to the point where we can say that people are socially coerced into wanting to be into romantic relationships. we will reach Hi u/mushumango420, . that sucks, hope you're doing okay, etc". if theyre happy and healthy, if theyve make good friends or are in relationships That’s sort of where I’m at with my ex bestie too, her one friend didn’t approve of me either because she deemed me as competition she thru poisoned my friend about me. I'm talking about ex friends you've lost 100% contact with, so no social media, no mutual connections just nothing, lost to the wind. I’m still friends with my ex but every time we hang out we end up sleeping together. I don't understand how someone who is so emotionally unavailable, would want to keep me in his life so much. he accepted. PLEASE listen to this list and consider it before staying friends with your ex after a This is a pattern I’ve noticed in both DAs I’ve dated and my friends that are DAs and end things with people. Since the breakup things have been My ex wanted to stay friends so I tried for that. As for others I think the process of the break up for dumpee would be a reason and for the dumper to save face and have a reason behind the dumping. This happened to me. 26 years she wasted with a man who treated her like shit and played with her feelings and emotions. I have friends that I trust and that trust and confide in me. Why do I think about her being with another, why does that make me angry or sad or hurt. I am glad we are though. A month later he wanted to get back together so we talked and thought abt it for another month, and were back together for 2 months. You don’t owe anybody anything. my DA ex, after apologizing for having hurt me during the worst deactivating and devaluating phases, suggested to evolve our relationship into a friendship. Please don’t take this in an aggressive or condescending way. I feel she deserves to read my words and understand that this is not an easy thing for someone to go through I'm not trying to make me the better guy or him a worse guy my entire problem is why is she changing herself so much for their relationship but wasn't even a little bit of that to me. Oh yes! Same situation. that my narc ex has so many friends and he would make them a priority when we were dating and he was my only friend and he would hang out with them more than me and after our breakup he’s always with them and so happy and it makes me want to get revenge seeing someone who hurt you so badly and wasted my time and the fact he doesn’t care it I had to email my ex for closure since I was blocked on everything and the last thing she said in her email was how it bothered her I just talked to other women (who were nothing more than friends) when we broke up (mind you, she dumped me in the worst way possible. No one is above this. My hole enviroment said it is for the best and that I wasnt as much available for my family and friends as before I met her. I live at home with my parents after moving home from graduating undergrad away from friends. i know the consequences and that's the I thought we could be friends when I first got dumped. i never did the things i did intentionally. I can't. We were together a year, I broke up 4 weeks ago because he wouldn’t commit to a relationship after a year. I thought about leaving my ex and was thinking that, that i don’t want her completely out of my life bc I care about her. Like my friend who was dumped just weeks before her wedding. So, while I see what you're saying, I have to say that you probably should let your past remain in the past. I want to let her know that this is not easy for me. It took time to become friends however. she barely speaks to me when we text we just send pictures back and fourth, she always wants alone time which includes If a friend does not talk to you or takes a lot of times to respond, you would not be anxious or asking why they stopped. He wanted to meet in person last week to talk, but the only thing he wanted to say was that he truly loves me, he misses me and he regrets this. In my situation, ex wanted to stay friends because we were best friends for a while, and I was “too important” and she didn’t wanna hurt me. My ex from a few years ago keeps trying to re add me on Facebook. I’m not good enough to be her boyfriend so I get knocked down a peg to a friend. it doesn’t mean you haven’t moved on by discussing someone you dated it just means you’re able to grow, learn and share the experience too without feeling defeated by it. I haven’t reached out to any other ex in my life but throughout the pandemic, almost all my other exes have reached out. I'm only still good friends with one of my exes and I'm on good terms with most of the rest of them. this guy ends up my ex was a good actor because he seemed really happy during our relationship but also with me gone too. ” I treated my ex badly . we don't talk anymore so it's more of that i'm being nosey about his life. I want her to learn something from my words so she doesnt do the same thing to the next guy I feel it's right. Quite frankly they did not give me the opportunity to fix any of the issues in the relationship, so even though they highlighted some of my better qualities during the breakup, I can't help but think they associate me with complicated and frustrated feelings. My wife doesn't like me fighting and would probably doghouse me at a minimum, or divorce me in the worst of cases if I ever picked a stupid fight again or instigated something on purpose. She refuses to believe the truth because when it hits her it will hurt a lot. I hope my ex heals and stops treating women poorly. made me feel awful about myself. She had mentioned to me about a month ago that she wouldn’t want to be my friend anymore if I got back with my ex, although I thought she was kidding and/or exaggerating. If we were I wouldn't be here. Honestly I spend my life wondering why people aren’t my friends or why they don’t like me more. It has been 6 months since though, so I think (i hope) he no longer has those feelings and am trying my best to trust when he said he got over her. dynamics change, the entire relationship changes - I understand you had deep meaningful conversations with him in the past, but I think you need to accept that he's moved on and you're not part of From most BP people I’ve talked to they all say the same thing, that once I relationship ended for them they never wanted to fix it or rekindle anything. If you don't want that, you are not That really struck a cord with me. One of the most common reasons why an ex would want to be friends is because they miss spending time with you. Of course I don't want my ex to be happy because that means she will be happy WITHOUT me, and I'm hoping for the opposite of that. I would definitely block her but I get making it awkward. There was a period of no contact afterwards because she broke up with me, and I was still (and sorta still am) in love with her, so I needed space to deal with the crap running through my head. dumping and blocking me on everything before I could reply, and changed her usernames) as a result of So me and my ex were together for a year and he broke up with me on my birthday 3 months ago. She doesn’t see the car I found for her so she wouldn’t have to Uber. idk why but i think desperation drives me so badly to get a relationship. Or maybe he’s worried you’re talking poorly about him so he doesn’t want to lose his friends. If they were really my friends they would of contacted me to ask me what was going on anyway. I am not sure why. That’s why “Why does my ex want to be friends?” The reasons vary: He might not have met someone new, he might see you as a backup plan, he might fear losing what you had, he might long for the physical connection, or he might If your ex is trying to be friends with you, it might be because they want to get closer to your friends. Felt good after. I wanted to atleast remain friends, he said we could, as that's my source of closure but he literally dropped off the face of the planet, his current fiancé hates my guts, and I have no idea why to this day. I want to stay with my now ex so badly, but the cheating is a deal breaker so I m forcing myself to leave even though every cell in my body wants to stay. It was a constant reminder of why we worked so well in the first place. but some people aren't interested in being friends once a relationship is over. shes apparently happy now with her new boyfriend so why rub it in my face, why hurt me so much when you are happy. He has a group who will always pay attention to him. I’m an extremely forgiving person and I don’t like holding grudges against people, so even though the relationships might’ve been messy and ended badly, I still believe they’re good people and I want to be friends with them. Thank you for this. I will help out a girlfriend to the best of my ability. He’s trying to keep you on the hook for his own benefit. My ex hates me and doesn’t want to ever speak to me. (In fact, for a while there as teenagers, we were pretty much each others only friends. He is god awful. Gives them a bit of power over the breakup, boosts their ego. i cant get over the simple fact that my girlfriend treats me like absolute shit. Staying friends with your ex has absolutely no positive benefits. I don’t like my ex and I don’t want him in my life. i don't have any social media that i can rightly see what they're up to, so i guess i'm just curious as to whether or not they are still shitheads. she always gets mad at me when i address a problem in our relationship, she gets mad when i tell her what bothers me and she says she gets upset. My EX GF is pretty much using my best-friends wife to communicate to me. I have questioned myself to ask my friend to cut off contact Calling them out would probably just lead to an akward conversation and lots of denial (from them). My ex and I broke up on New Years but continued to speak and see each other afterwards. After the breakup I went into solitude and doubled down on; •working out (got ridiculously shredded) •started a side business to focus my spare time into (quite successful) •hung out with friends who weren’t apart of worldly culture (drinking, smoking, drugs, partying, alcohol) • DIDNT drink or party • meditated, learnt more about myself •figured out my pros and cons and worked I totally understood, but wanted to be friends with my ex so I brought up hanging out with her and her husband, who I desperately tried to be friends with. My current ex is my friend but we're still very complicated. The downgraded relationship relieves your ex’s Hey I also feel the same way. My ex hateeees party, and she is an introvert, so being with many people drains her a lot. If he wants to be friends, I would suggest giving it time if that’s something you want to do. Don’t poison your mind because another person is flawed. It could be that he genuinely wants to be friends and doesn't understand the pain that he's caused you. My dad did this with my mom. I have so many friends and had a lot of hookups too lately but nothing ever makes me feel anything. But fuck I hate this situation. 99% of people, like friends and family, never believed that there's nothing romantic left between us, cuz we were together for almost 6 years. He does seem sympathetic to me and told me he was going to take care of it and talk to my ex. she's an amazing woman, but she broke my heart so badly that I can't have her in my life anymore. I’m glad to be dating my best friend, but I guess my anxiety is making me think the worst. The conversation started off something like "soo apparently my ex is seeing xxxxxxx now". I stayed best friends with my ex for a year and a half after he broke up with me and literally almost ALL of these things on this list happened!!!! I initiated NC with him almost 3 months ago now and it's the best decision I've made. i have a feeling she want's me to feel so From this post, I understand that the first negative interactions with his friends came from his own insecurities. Certainly when it's just fresh give it at It's weird to read commentaries saying that it's better to leave her. Maybe it’s my ego but I feel like I’m being demoted. Agreeing to be friends is worse than hell. I find this so relatable because 8 years ago my ex-fiance also cheated on me. The fact that he is still “friends” with his exes demonstrates what a great guy he is. Very few friendships can be truly born out of negative past events and feelingsit just doesn’t work. I feel like APs might do it to try to get back together, secure people cut them off for a while and might eventually become friendly again, but DAs always want a weird platonic friendship from the second you break up, in my experience. Since none of my friends get me and just blaming me for not forgetting completely. Fast forward 3 months of trying to get in touch she blocked me and I lost it, On months 3 I had a family member reach out to see if she was doing okay and she basically was a cold hearted monster didn't even bother to ask if I had been suffering for the last 3 months barely able to keep my composure, I raged and I deleted her Instagram posts and felt so guilty but she wanted to As the title states, my best friend of almost 2 years is upset I got back together with my ex. ok, so you tell her something like: "Why do you keep complaining to me about how your boyfriend is not as good a boyfriend as me. Weird thing is when I got dx with breast cancer told my dad he loved me. I want to text her so fucking badly. Here are some possible reasons. I had to deal with a lot of negativity cuz my ex bf is one my best friends. That has to be incredibly difficult. was out on apps almost immediately looking for casual relationships. They seek validation and boosting their ego knowing they'll always I'm saying I've been dumped and my ex tried to stay friends because she didn't want to be hated. During the breakup in April he said he'd wanted to dump me since before Christmas, but in that time period he said "I love you" for the first time and talked about long-term plans and agreed to go on holiday with me and said so many times how happy he was, how much he loved me, how lucky he was to have me. It could be that they’re lonely and want some new friends, or maybe they’ve developed a crush on one of your friends. After he dumped me he got these sexy ass braids and been posting it on social Get the Reddit app Scan this I personally am a really lonely teen so that's why but I heard from my friends that they just want to go down or just "be engaged" because everyone says it's cool i am 14 and i want a gf badly. he doesn't owe you a friendship just because you want one is it nice to be friends with your ex? I suppose. We noticed you are a pretty new Reddit account, so we just wanted to let you know to check out the subreddit rules here and maybe have a read through our Frequently Asked Questions - they make for fascinating reading!. I keep pushing to get a dog to help be my buddy but my parents are against it OP, you have friends already. The problem is that I’m too kind to do it. Then I was being left on read for 12+ hours, and eventually ghosted. Is this normal? I also think he has moved on and I am still struggling. Sometimes I want to wish bad things on him or really want him to miss me, but then I catch myself. Is there a reason for that? Why does my ex want to fix this so badly, and can I then assume that she’s being genuine? Posted by u/star2299 - 1 vote and 3 comments Cutting contact sounds so cold, so emotionally inflexible, to the point where the person doing it ends up looking like the less virtuous part of the relationship. out of the blue 2 weeks after (1 month after breakup) that she was trying to get back together with me and i asked her about if she had done anything with anyone else and she told me and i told her i’d think about it for a couple days. My family and I have always been pretty good about being polite with my and my siblings’ exes and their families, and vice versa for all my exesexcept the last one (who blindsided me). But we're long distance and I don't want to break no contact so instead I ripped her picture apart & destroyed all the gifts she gave. Dude, if you don’t see how hurtful you are and the only reason you want your ex is because you’re addicted to “she loved me so much I never thought she would leave. My ex still called me daily, still supported me through difficult times and vice versa. I had an ex do that. Get the Reddit app Scan this Despite all this, the only thing I want in the world is her. The few times I have tried to remain, friends, it turned into her using my generosity to get every benefit she had when we were together but without the sex or relationship. She wants me out so I’m out. So though I know blocking him is probably a great option I’m just so stuck. She barely It really all depends. My partner definitely treats me well. My friend thought it was an out-of-the-blue breakup. I set boundaries as I wanted to heal first. She didn’t love him. I’m now in a masters program and it’s online and I can’t form those new friendships. He moved his stuff out of our place together and completely discarded me. And I met someone I actually like. Do you really need to be friends with your ex? What good does that bring? Even if you are in the same friend group, you can be I want to let her know. I reached out a few times and we simply spoke about my ex’s hobbies. They have also called me with any inconvenience they had in the last couple of weeks or so to help them. . People make mistakes. They Miss Spending Time with You. The poison you’ve been telling your ex was “I’m better than you and you are puny you will never find better than me. Heck, they probably still have feelings and don’t want to lose the attachment so suddenly. I feel used and abused for growth on her end. He treated me really badly and I want nothing more to do with him. Haven't really ever felt the need to, ditched a lot of the negative, toxic, so-called "friends" I used to have that would egg me on or try to create situations where a fight would happen. She was so vile that she had to be just using me all this time she was never my friend. The bigger mystery to me is, why do the exes want to be friends with him? My only guess is that he has impressed a false reality upon them which they have Then I noticed he stopped watching my instastories (and I wasn’t watching his), so I removed him as a follower. He still follows me, but his sister deleted me everywhere, and his mom removed me as a follower from her private IG account, but still follows me. I want him to suffer all the body dysmorphia you can imagine. but my other exes, some were shitty to me, and i really do not know why i look them up on the internet. Don’t let him string you along and waste your time. Also They were the one who treated me like shit with the lies and manipulation for the last year or so. And op! Thank you too. I tried to stay friends with him but he would freak out about me talking to other guys and would just behave really irrationally about us. her defence for hurting me this much after the break up was sorry i'm just a human i make mistakes too. The one friend with any decency confessed to me and showed me messages between them. Unfortunately, he forgot to mention that he’d already begun a new relationship. This was the 8th time he had ended it with me. Turns out our friends couldn’t stand him anyway so he got weeded out real quick after the break up. Why does she stop the abuse just to leave why couldn’t she stop it when we were together. I want to let her know about my feelings. My friend reached out to him and told him to leave me alone because he was just setting me back. The relationship didn't end well at She seems to want to build herself up by tearing you down not sure why though if you broke up because you didn't mesh well. My advice, cut your losses and focus your time + energy on literally anything else. My Ex would cry to me all the time and open up and would be kind of clingy and always want to do things with me but when we broke up she accused me all the things she would do and would paint me as some clingy cry baby that thought she was a goddess and like i was incredibly privaliged to even be in her presence. Making new friends, trying to deepen the friendships you have with current friends or maybe going to therapy can help you a lot. That does not stop me from longing to have my old friends back. Here's my 33 year old opinion that is no more valid than anyone else's so take it with a grain of salt. Why does your ex want to be friends? They want security and the comfort of a relationship without the labels/commitment. She's dealing with denial (yay stages of grief!). Normal normal normal. Told me it was the best day of his life getting away from me and that he wishes he never met me. her friend circle is: her 1 best friend (who treats my gf like shit), her best friends bf (who is cool but silent with me), 1 man hating lesbian type, 1 ex gf lesbian friend, one guy friend who depends on the situation for me (f20) i think it’s mature to be able to discuss those things casually because it’s apart of their history and same on your own side too. Normal. My best advice is to just leave them. I only have myself to blame for my own actions, but my former friends could have been more patient and sympathetic of me. it won’t work trust me. As for why he still wants to talk to you, it's hard to say for sure. And ask if we could be friend later when Im ready. But he really wants to be friends, which is what I don't understand. So it all hurts and the breakup is still relatively fresh Yeah iam rigid. I just assume my ex never expects to see me again. She was the one who was sitting next to me while my ex sobbed in his coffee about how much he missed me, rolling her eyes, because I was in the same situation as you. The audacity. Warning: Long read ahead. But from someone who lays awake at night Posted by u/Hello_dilly_dally - 1 vote and no comments Do Instill think about my exof course Indo but I just wish her well and let her be happywe gave it a go and tried but it wasn’t meant to be. He recently found out I’m dating other people which makes me think this is the reason why he is so eager to talk to me in person. My new boyfriend doesn’t want me to focus on this, and seems to feel a little offended I’m getting so emotional, like I’m hung up over my ex. I am glad to have my friends around and I'm very thankful to them and couldn't exist without them, but it's not the same as a relationship and hookups . Unless you have kids it is better to make the break cleanly. Took me a year to realize that i really couldn't deal with that in high school so we broke up. I have been used more than treated as a friend. I have 3 golden friends in my life because it took me 2 years of carefull communication and being wary of who they are untill i felt comfortable enough to call them my friends. But my ex ended up being an unhealed fearful avoidant (I wasn’t aware), so once he flipped around 6 For me, avoiding him would mean avoiding my other friends and I have done so much work on myself so I don't have to make that choice. We were friends as children and grew very close in high school where, due to her rough home life, she spent a lot of time at my place. It took my mom 26 years to get away from my dad. I don’t Of my exes, I can’t imagine getting back with them unless maybe we possibly met again in like 5-10 years. Sometimes people run for the grass being greener somewhere else but it rarely if ever does. I do think a lot of people say, "I want to be friends" when they mean "I want us to act in a civil manner towards each other if we see each other in public because I don't have any lingering Get the Reddit app Scan this Why does my ex want to be just friends but acts like we’re in a relationship? She broke up with me saying that she feels the spark is gone because she’s so comfortable and that she still needs to heal after her abusive ex. Just the week before, he was writing “I love you” in the condensation on the kitchen window and talking about how excited he was to marry her. An example: one of them was super possessive and asked me to delete all me off of my social media. Presumably she'll say something like "well, I already ruined it with you" to which you say "We're not ruined. I just wanted to talk to my friend about my life and what was going on. Probably be wise to shift your energy from "romantic interest" to "concerned friend worried about her personal Well, my ex was diagnosed with schizophrenia a year and a half in to our relationship. My desperation to have them back only made things worse. She could have good intentions and enjoy you as a person without the sex (that's the case with my ex and I right now) or she could just be milking the lack of outsider knowledge so she can keep the taken status. This has helped me so much. I reached out to an ex after 4 years to apologize for how badly I treated him after we broke up. Especially just transitioning directly from dating to being friends. I don't dislike any of my exes (my most recent one a little but I know that will go away too). It's only been 2 weeks since the breakup and I really want to lash out at my ex. Wanted to be friends so bad after he dumped me because we were in the same social circle. I had this happen years ago (wasn't my best friend, but a close one). It's making me feel crazy. So someone is going to have to be the villain. ) And then he got mad at me when I started crying about it. 2 of those years he was unemployed and I supported him and paid for everything. Why does my ex want to be friends so badly? Your ex wants to stay friends so badly because friendship allows your ex to make a clean transition from a relationship to a single life. Anyway, Nancy & my ex-bf were an item up until about 6 months ago, and now my ex-bf is hanging out with my friend Mary and coming closer. It’s almost impossible to be friends with an ex, some people are manage, but this is very rare. . (Except my divorce, of course we have kids so are forced to stay in each others lives. Done. This particular ex sounds like a toxic bag of lunacy and not only should you want him as far away as possible, so should sheand the fact that she doesn't speaks poorly of her decision making ability at this juncture in her life. I want him to be deadnamed every day. Someone here will say that I want to be in a relationship with him, and a part of me will hope for it, and that is true and disappear with time. He ends up getting with my best friends sister (overlapped relationships) and pushes her away, makes her move out etc. I mean random men, men from my school, and even guy friends (people who I only had platonic relationships with and never did anything with). This is what I am doing now. I’m finally happy being single. Set firm boundaries and stick to them! In our final argument I said I needed space and he said “space dosent fix anything for me you don’t need space 🥲” even though his therapist said he needs to start giving me space to process my emotions so i could actually forgive him and don’t become violent and unhinged (the day he took my keys I started trying to take them back aggressively while crying so I could leave. But before NC, she came over and cried, saying she was drinking too much and the breakup was hard on We talked about getting dinner and maybe being friends. But she ended up breaking up with me before. I just really want to speak to him and it’s torture knowing he doesn’t want to talk to me. Try and find the source of these problems but at the same time, be I think it is a coping mechanism. Instead of going back and forth with he said she said I was over it, and I moved on from everyone.

Why does my ex want to be friends so badly reddit. I set boundaries as I wanted to heal first.